Parents, or childless, by choice

Children are a force of nature, but they are not inevitable in a marriage or a relationship, says child-free lifestyle advocate Jerry Steinberg in an interview with 2:The Magazine for Couples.

(The interview in the magazine's summer issue was accompanied by a not-altogether-tongue-in-cheek sidebar about the 10 reasons why young couples might rather buy a kitten than have a child.)

Steinberg runs No Kidding!, an international social club for childless (those who can’t have kids) and child-free (those who don’t want kids) couples and singles. It has grown to 80 chapters in six countries with about 10,000 members worldwide since starting up in 1984. He said:

Until the age of 23 or 24, I had every intention of getting married and having several kids. But after helping raise my brother and sister, babysitting, teaching and relationships with several single mothers, it became clear to me that, even though I truly like children, I wasn’t really parent material.

An interesting counterpoint is provided by The Dance Current, where one of the magazine's online discussion forums addresses the issue "Can dancers have families?" There are some heartfelt posts by dancers who have chosen to have children, or are thinking about it, discussing the balancing act between art and parenting. For instance, dancer Jamie Wright talking about a dancer baby boom in Montreal:

I am one of several (12-15 at last count) working dancers who has had a baby in the past year. She was born in August 2005 and in November I was teaching, in December I and my family travelled to Quebec city where I set a piece on graduating students and in February 2006 I started a full-time dance position with a company here in Montreal. It is a huge juggling act(as it is for any working mother), but I have had the constant support of my partner who has travelled to help with the baby, and who has been a stay at home father while I dance. Being a parent and a professional takes incredible split focus. When I am at work, I am there 110%. When I am home with Fiona, I am with her 110%. In my eyes, neither suffers. In fact, I find myself even more inspired to dance than before my pregnancy.